Parent Coordination

Dr. Ernest W. Reilly, LCSW is a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, Parent Coordinator, Licensed Therapist, Parenting Coach, and an expert in working with high conflict divorces. Dr. Reilly completed his doctoral dissertation on assisting high conflict divorced coparents and he brings his over twenty years experience in assisting divorced co-parents, children, and families as well as his extensive knowledge in psychological, relational, emotional, cognitive, behavioral, and family systems dynamics to help during these difficult situations. As a Parent Coordinator Dr. Reilly also uses his understanding of childhood developmental issues, healthy co-parenting, and how to help co-parents navigate all the difficulties of divorced life, to help co-parents and their families. He has extensive expertise in helping to improve co-parenting communication, assist in managing emotions effectively, regulating and reducing anger, and helping co-parents solve problems, reduce conflicts, and create healthier co-parenting situations for their children.

For the last thirty years, the divorce rate in the United States has ranged between 40 and 50 percent(Clark-Stewart & Brentano, 2006; Gaulier, Margerum, Price, & Windell, 2007), and research indicates that the divorce rate is approximately 10% worse for second marriages (Engblom-Deglmann, 2009; Ganong, Coleman, & Weaver, 2002). With this level of marital dissolution, almost half of the children born today will experience the divorce of their parents (Hetherington, Stanley-Hagan, & Anderson, 1989), and because approximately three quarters of those who divorce will remarry (Amato, 2000), many children will experience more than one divorce during their childhood. Parents who divorce may be legally separated from their former spouses, but they remain tied to one another through their children, thus facing the challenge of coparenting.

The families most severely impacted by divorce, however, are the approximately 20 percent of parents and children involved in high-conflict divorces (Gaulier et al., 2007; Maccoby & Mnookin, 1992; Malcore, 2011; R. Stewart, 2001). Without effective interventions, these couples will usually continue to battle throughout their children's lifetimes resulting in years of poor coparenting and injury after injury to each other and their children.

Coparenting is an enterprise of two or more adults, typically parents, who take on the shared responsibility to care for and raise a child or children (McHale, 2007; McHale, Lauretti, Talbot, & Pouquette, 2002; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). In the 1970s and 1980s as more and more children began to be raised in post-divorce coparenting situations, evidence began to emerge that severe emotional and behavioral distress was occurring in the lives of these children (Emery, 1982; Hetherington, Cox, & Cox, 1978; Wallerstein & Kelly, 1975; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). However, in families where coparenting existed and parents worked well together and supported one another's parenting efforts, the childrenâï¿½ï¿½s functioning, development, and mental health were not as severely impacted, and children showed far fewer signs of distress (Bonach, 2007; Maccoby & Mnookin, 1992; McHale, 2007; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). Coparenting can make all the difference in the world for a developing child, and its absence can be devastating to that child.

Parent coordination is very effective option for high conflict divorce situations or parents who are struggling with significant co-parenting issues. Parent Coordination is intended to help reduce conflict, increase coparenting, and resolve parenting-related issues more effectively. This intervention is one of the newest effective approaches to address high-conflict divorces (Deutsch, 2008). This process is a court-ordered, child-centered, alternative, dispute-resolution approach that uses a therapist specifically trained and certified in parent coordination to help parents implement their parenting plan and coparent by facilitating the resolution of their disputes more efficiently (Carter, 2011; Gaulier et al., 2007; Henry et al., 2011). This approach is especially well suited for divorced individuals who have refused or have failed at other intervention methods and are experiencing a high level of coparenting problems.

This process simply requires either party to petition the court or attain a court order assigning a Parenting Coordinator (PC) to assist the parties in creating healthier coparenting situations, reducing toxic or chronic unhealthy behaviors, improving coparenting communication, helping coparents improve problem solving and find effective ways to help resolve issues and disputes. By improving these issues parent coordination is quite effective in improving the quality of life for both parents and most importantly for the child(ren).

If you are in need of Parent Coordination simply contact your attorney or petition the court and request the court assign Dr. Ernie Reilly, LCSW as your parent coordinator. Once your parent coordination is court ordered please contact the Counseling Corner to set up a time to begin the process with Dr. Reilly and we will assist you with the rest.

Collaborative Law

About Collaborative Law

Parents who divorce may be legally separated from their former spouses, but they remain tied to one another through their children, thus facing the challenge of coparenting. Extensive research reports that the most destructive part of divorce is the conflict and inter-parental conflict. Finding ways to reduce this conflict and maintain or create healthy coparenting functioning is therefore essential. The Collaborative Divorce is an excellent method at reducing conflict, decreasing stress and harm during the divorce process, and helping children and families cope better and find better solutions during and after the divorce process.

The hurt, anger, and sense of injury experienced after most divorces will often impair or reduce the functioning of the divorcing individuals, their children, and families. The divorce often impacts each individuals parenting, coparenting, professional work, and social functioning. If parents must divorce, research clearly demonstrates that the healthiest thing they can do is to find ways to reduce their conflict and find ways to divorce with the least amount of conflict. Collaborative family law is an excellent approach for utilizing a team approach in order to divorce in the healthiest manner. As a result of the success of Collaborative Divorces they are growing extensively in popularity with couples who wish to reduce their conflict and divorce in the healthiest way possible. Collaborative Divorces are now available in the United States, Canada, England, Ireland, Scotland, and Australia. This service typically combines the use of a team approach to resolving disputes with the goal of decreasing conflict, emotional and relational damage, and preservation of the economic and emotional resources of the divorcing couples.

These collaborative teams typically consist of a collaboratively trained attorney for each client, a collaboratively trained mental health professional, and a financial planner or forensic accountant. The process is negotiated so that all parties agree to proceed without litigation in order to avoid the destructive nature of the court process and do not rely on court-imposed solutions (Deutsch, 2008). The collaborative divorce process is based on a legal agreement to avoid court, to have an open exchange of information, to work collaboratively to meet both parties needs in the most reasonable ways, and recognizing that when children are involved, finding healthy ways to reduce conflict and maintain healthy relationships and responsibilities is essential to the children.

The Collaborative Divorce is done on the family's schedule, not the court's schedule, and the whole process is done while avoiding court. Avoiding court and avoiding court ordered mediation, is another way the family is spared stress, turmoil, and much of the typical conflict of a divorce is avoided. In addition, by avoiding court the family's financial and familial dealings are kept out of court and public records thereby maintaining confidentiality much more effectively than the standard divorce. Imagine never having to step inside a courtroom, having a highly trained team guide you through the process, and having the whole process kept completely confidential. This level of collaboration is very promising (Deutsch, 2008) and can be a great benefit to couples as they seek to reduce conflict and increase cooperation in coparenting.

If you are interested in a Collaborative Divorce simply contact us and we can help assist you through this process. If you have already have an attorney and would like Dr. Reilly to serve on your Collaborative Divorce team please let us and your attorney know. If you would like to discuss this process with Dr. Reilly please contact the Counseling Corner to set up a time to begin the process with Dr. Reilly and we will assist you with the rest.

Divorce Mediation

Parents who divorce may be legally separating from their former spouses, but they will remain tied to one another through their children, thus facing the challenge of coparenting for years to come. An effective family mediation process can help reduce conflict, decrease tension, appropriately plan for the future, reduce the expenses of costly legal and court battles, and provide a healthier process for family legal dispute resolution

Mediation is often an effective way to help people settle many different types of divorce, parenting plan, and family law related disputes, In family mediations, parties have a chance to share their views and find helpful solutions in a safe environment and to constructively discuss important issues such as communication, separation, child related issues, support, time-sharing, alimony, debt, division of property and other family matters (American Bar Association). Mediation uses a is a neutral and impartial third person facilitate the resolution of a legally related family dispute. It is an non-adversarial process and is intended to help families reach agreements that are mutually acceptable and beneficial. The mediation process, when done well, can greatly reduce conflict and aid finding helpful solutions creating healthier environments for both parents and more importantly for their children.

The hurt, anger, and sense of injury experienced during most divorces will often impair or reduce the functioning of the divorcing individuals, their children, and families. The divorce process often impacts each individual's parenting, co parenting, professional work, and social functioning. Research demonstrates that it the inter-parental conflict that is most harmful for the children and the adults during and after a divorce. With approximately half of all marriages ending in injuries of this kind, the problems facing divorcing parents are substantial. Successful family mediation can help reduce these problems.

Parenting Plans and Preparations

As a Parenting Plan Evaluator and Consultant Dr. Reilly uses his understanding of childhood developmental issues, healthy co-parenting, and how to help co-parents navigate all the difficulties of divorcing and divorced life to help co-parents and their families find solutions during the divorce process. He has extensive expertise in helping to improve co-parenting communication, assist in managing emotions effectively, regulating and reducing anger, and helping co-parents solve problems, reduce conflicts, and create healthier co-parenting situations and parenting plans for their children. In addition to providing parenting plan evaluation services himself, Dr. Reilly is also often used as a specialist and consultant to help parents review parenting plans already or in the process of being created providing guidance as an expert in children, teenagers, parenting plans, effective coparenting, and problem solving strategies for divorced coparents

An effective parenting plan evaluation process and the creations of a useful parenting plan can help reduce conflict, decrease tension, appropriately plan for the future, reduce the expenses of costly legal and court battles, and provide a healthier process for families and children.

A Parenting Plan is required in all cases involving time-sharing with minor child(ren), even when time- sharing is not in dispute (Florida Supreme Court). A parenting plan is part of a separation agreement between two divorcing parents. This plan becomes the rule book and addresses many important issues and potential pitfalls so both parents know what to expect and opportunities for conflict, misunderstandings, and difficulties resulting from unmet expectations can be reduced.

A good parenting plan does all these things and provides both parents and their children with increased predictability, consistency, and stress reduction. A good parenting plan sets out the expectations, rules, time-sharing schedule, and a vast array of protocols and arrangements for the child(ren). The plan helps parents avoid conflicts arising from a lack of these rules, expectation, protocols, & guidelines in dealing with responsibilities related to providing for their children.

When no agreements exist around these areas disputes can frequently arise and court litigation and family mediation may be needed thereby increasing tension, stress, turmoil, and expense for the parents. It is therefore very advantageous to have a trained professional and expert in children help you and your spouse create your parenting plan.

The hurt, anger, and sense of injury experienced during most divorces will often impair or reduce the functioning of the divorcing individuals, their children, and families. The divorce process often impacts each individual's parenting, coparenting, professional work, and social functioning. Research demonstrates that it the inter-parental conflict that is most harmful for the children and the adults during and after a divorce. With approximately half of all marriages ending in injuries of this kind, the problems facing divorcing parents are substantial. Having and expert in children and parenting plans guide you through and help you create your parenting plan by helping both parents find agreeable and beneficial solutions to parenting responsibilities and parenting struggles can often help reduce these problems.

Court Ordered Evaluations

At the Counseling Corner we offer a vast array of general and specialized mental health related testing services throughout the Orlando and the Central Florida area.

ADHD, ADD, Attention Deficit Disorder Testing, Evaluation, and Treatment
Sports Evaluations and Mental Health Evaluations for Athletes
504, IEP (Individualized Educational Plan) Evaluations and Assessments for Specialized Accommodations for School Children, Teenagers, and Young Adults
Depression Testing, Evaluation, and Treatment
Anxiety Testing, Evaluation and Treatment
Eating Disorder Assessment and Treatment
Sexual Health, Sexual Disorder, Sexual Addictions Evaluations and Treatment
Autistic Spectrum Disorder and Aspergers Disorder Testing, and Treatment
Anger Management Evaluation and Treatment
Court Ordered Evaluations and Mental Health Treatment
Probation Evaluations and Mental Health Treatment
Behavior Disorder Evaluations and Treatment
Coparenting Evaluations and Treatment
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Evaluation and Treatment
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Evaluation and Treatment
Social Skills Evaluations and Treatment
Coping Skills Evaluations Treatment
Relationship Skills Evaluations and Treatment
Grief Evaluations and Treatment
Inter-parental Conflict Evaluations and Treatment
High Conflict Divorce Evaluations and Treatment
Social Work Evaluations
Psychosocial Evaluations
Adoption Evaluations

Co-Parenting Counseling

Coparenting is an enterprise of two or more adults, typically parents, who take on the shared responsibility to care for and raise a child or children (McHale, 2007; McHale, Lauretti, Talbot, & Pouquette, 2002; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). When children are part of family relationships in which they are cared for and socialized by multiple parenting figures, some sort of coparenting is occurring (McHale, 2007; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). In the 1970s and 1980s as more and more children began to be raised in post-divorce coparenting situations, evidence began to emerge that severe emotional and behavioral distress was occurring in the lives of these children (Emery, 1982; Hetherington, Cox, & Cox, 1978; Wallerstein & Kelly, 1975; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). However, in families where coparenting existed and parents worked well together and supported one another's parenting efforts, the children's functioning, development, and mental health were not as severely impacted, and children showed far fewer signs of distress (Bonach, 2007; Maccoby & Mnookin, 1992; McHale, 2007; McHale & Lindahl, 2011). Coparenting can make all the difference in the world for a developing child, and its absence can be devastating to that child (Reilly, 2014).

Unfortunately, high-conflict divorced parents typically lack any reasonable ability to coparent cooperatively (Anderson et al., 2011; Carter, 2011; Gaulier et al., 2007; Henry, Fieldstone, Thompson, Treharne, 2011; Maccoby & Mnookin, 1992). The high level of conflict in these parental relationships and the lack of coparenting, injures children even more severely than the typical divorce (Anderson et al., 2011; Carter, 2011; Gaulier et al., 2007; Henry et al., 2011; Maccoby & Mnookin, 1992). The intensity of the pain, anger experienced, and lack of forgiveness in these damaged relationships is immense and can be long-term if proper healing is not achieved (Bonach, 2007, 2009; Fruzzetti, 2006). These negative effects lead many researchers and clinicians to seek ways to reduce the trauma of these problem areas surrounding coparenting struggles and increase healthy cooperative coparenting (Reilly, 2014).

Coparenting, cooperative coparenting, quality coparenting, and positive attitude towards coparenting are terms that are often used interchangeably within mental health research. They are often defined as the process of parents working together in the same direction or aimed at achieving this goal. An attitude of cooperation and a willingness to work together and share decisions and the parenting process is present. The parents cooperate with each other for the best interest of the child. They share a belief that both parents are important in the child's life despite difficulties the parents may have with each other (Reilly, 2014). Mental health counseling services, coparenting counseling, and divorce recovery services are some of the avenues available for families wanting to reduce conflict, increase cooperation, and find healthy ways to cooperatively coparent. The typical formats available are individual counseling for the parent and/or the child to help the parent and child adjust, cope, and recover from difficult situations, coparenting counseling for the parental dyad (coparents), or family counseling (Reilly, 2014).

If you are in need of Co-parenting Counseling you are welcome to call the Counseling Corner and Dr. Reilly or one of our therapist will be happy to assist you with this process. Just give us a call and we will assist you with the rest.

Parent/Child Reunification Therapy

At the Counseling Corner Dr. Reilly is our resident expert at reunification therapy, reestablishing parent/child relationships, building or Rebuilding Parent Child Bonding, Healing Wounds and resolving issues between a parent and child, addressing issues related to alienation, and training for all types of parenting and parent/child situations. Dr. Reilly is an expert in childhood development, childhood needs, child therapy, teen counseling, parenting interventions as well as being a licensed therapist, Parent Coordinator, a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, a Parenting Educator, a Parenting Coach, an expert in working with marriages and divorces and parents and children, Dr. Reilly even completed his doctoral dissertation on working forgiveness issues and issues related to healing family relationships so he brings his over twenty years experience in assisting parents, children, and families as well as his extensive knowledge in psychological, relational, emotional, cognitive, behavioral, and family systems dynamics to help during these extremely difficult situations.

As an expert in parent and child reunification Dr. Reilly uses his understanding of childhood developmental issues, healthy parenting, healthy parent child relationships, and how to help parents navigate all the difficulties of creating or reestablishing a healthy parenting/child relationship. Many reunification situations can be extremely complex and sensitive in nature, especially if legal factors are be involved. In those situations, a less trained therapist can often create additional confusion, trauma, alienating factors, and unnecessary tension. For this reason, Dr. Reilly is not only a highly trained therapist, he is also a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator, a qualified Parent Coordinator, an expert in high conflict divorces, and is also trained in the Interdisciplinary Model of Collaborative Family Law and can function as a neutral mental health professional in legal cases when needed. This additional education, training and expertise can often help greatly reduce tension, confusion, family turmoil, expense, and can be a blessing for all family members.

Legally Related Mental Health Services